Baby showers, birthdays, and family reunions

I recently had to RSVP "no" to a close friends baby shower. These events are usually panic attacks waiting to happen for an infertile. I have a "secret" pinterest board for the "baby Boulton" baby shower. I made it for the few days I was pregnant before I miscarried. I can't delete it (to be honest there are some seriously cute ideas), but I cry every time I see it. Baby showers terrify us because it might be something we never get to experience. They are your first "party" into parenthood...a step most are just dying to get to.

Birthday parties (and family reunions) are tough too. Pat's nephew was born a few months after we started trying. So its like every year that passes, is another year that we haven't had a child. And the thing with birthdays is that a number is associated with it....that just seems to keep going up and up.

RSVPing in itself can be stressful. Most of the times when it is family or a close friend they understand. They know what you are going though and get it. Others times, not so much. The person thinks you don't want to be there or that you are mad at them. This is the EXACT opposite! I want nothing more than to go. To be there, and support you. It's not fun for anyone if i'm holding up the only bathroom for 20 minutes because I don't want to cry in a room full of strangers.

Invitations are great, and we LOVE seeing them. Just don't be upset, or take it personally when the RSVP says "no"....its best for everyone.